Missing the rides, but riding still

I rode in the Alaska AIDS Vaccine Ride, the Canada US AIDS Vaccine Ride, and the European AIDS Vaccine Ride. IN all I raised around $50,000.00. It continues to break my heart that these rides are no longer in existence. From looking at the numbers, it seems pretty clear that a LOT of money was raised, a LOT went to the beneficiaries, and a LOT is now not happening. It seems to me that the naysayers did a huge disservice to the beneficiaries, who now get nothing.

But more than that, we get nothing. Those three rides were amazing, transformational events for me. They were very hard, yes, but they also gave me the feeling that I was doing something really good, something that was really making a difference. And not only did the beneficiaries get the funds, the people who donated to me got a vicarious lift too.

This year I am going to ride across the country. I am riding with a small group of women, all of whom might or might not be raising money for a specific cause.

This is my 20th year of being an ovarian cancer survivor and so I am riding for that - to bring awareness to the fact that early detection can make a huge difference in surviving.

I'm excited and am looking forward to the ride.

But as I get trained and geared up, I feel a huge sadness that I am not part of a huge movement and a huge team of people who have come together to help do something very good.

I'm raising money and I'm going to do this ride and it will be a good thing. No doubt about it.

But I can't help thinking how much better it could be. I can't help thinking about how much I miss Pallotta Teamworks.